The weeks prior to leaving
The Lord had clearly confirmed to me that I was to go back to Zimbabwe for a season. It was hard for me to swallow but I knew that if that was the Lord’s will for me, then it was the best place for me to go. Once I accepted it and began making plans, I began to see God linking me up with certain people and making rivers in the desert and roads in the wilderness like He had promised to. (Isaiah 43:18-19). He began putting desires on my heart and filling me with an excitement for what He would do in and through me. So by the time it was time to leave, I was more than eager to see what the Lord had prepared in Zimbabwe.
17 June
I had an overnight flight to Harare, Zimbabwe. I met some cool people one of which was a guy named Simba who had been in the States for 10 years and this was his first time back in Zimbabwe. We didn’t talk for long but he was a devoted Christian and talking to him for that short while, reminded me that I would meet other people who have a heart for the Lord and are sold out for His purposes. I am not the only one. It reminded me of Elijah when he thought he was the only left who was zealous for the Lord. (1 Kings 19:14)
18 June
I arrived safely in Bulawayo, Zimbabwe. It was so good to see everyone again! Praise the Lord for His protection.
19 June
My aunt’s husband passed away the day I left and today was his funeral. I was flooded by emotions of death, missing home and not quite understanding why the Lord had brought me here. God reminded me of the brevity of life. Tomorrow is promised to no one so make the most of today. I’m Humbled by my lack of independence. Seeking the Lord for wisdom concerning a vehicle – I’ m learning to trust the Lord’s timing.
20 June
I went to a Pentecostal church and the Lord broke me of my pride. I didn’t think the preacher would have anything good to say but I was amazed when he spoke clearly from the Word of God and it was a word in season for me. “He has given us all things that pertain to life and godliness.”
21 June
It’s the winter solstice here today and therefore the shortest day of the year. My iTunes was refusing to work but then I prayed over it and opened it again and it was working! Praise the Lord! The lesson I learnt today in my devotions: “Combat comes before victory” and “A badly bruised soul is one who is chosen.”
22 June
I woke up feeling like I’d made the biggest mistake in coming back here but then I read this in my devotions: “Do not seek to run from His will and the circumstances in which He has placed you.” I was rebuked – pleasantly rebuked.
23 June
I loaned someone some money today. And as I was doing it the verse in Proverbs “Neither a borrower nor a lender be.” Kept ringing in my head but I ignored it. I haven’t seen that money since. We learn from our mistakes. I’d always heard the verse but never experienced practically what it implied. Now I know and I will NEVER make the same mistake again.
24 June
Why am I so afraid of claiming what’s mine in Christ Jesus? I guess because so many people abuse “claiming.” And that’s what scares me off. All the same, today I began claiming what I know to be true of me in Christ Jesus. I have the victory, I am a daughter of the Most High, I am favoured, I am loved, I am forgiven, I am valued etc
25 June
I’m questioning my decision again and I’m feeling as though I’m not really fulfilling any purpose by being here. But I read this, this morning in my devotions: “Never dread any consequence resulting form absolute obedience to His command.” And a great peace filled my heart.
26 June
I had a really good chat with my cousin about the things of the Lord and not compromising this morning. And as if divinely co-ordinated, I met Debbie (the director of YfC Zimbabwe) at the airport while I was waiting to pick up my cousin. We sat and talked and I knew today, that the Lord’s beautiful plan was beginning to unfold.
27 June
I went back to my old church today and my heart broke. Nothing had changed. Everyone still did the same things in the same way and there just seemed to be no growth in people’s lives. Let me not be quick to judge because that sounds a bit harsh but that is how it felt. The Lord confirmed to me that, that wasn’t where He wanted me to grow and serve. In my heart the Lord had already told me which church to go but I just wanted to see for myself. After today, I know exactly where I need to go.
28 June
I had a meeting with Debbie at YfC. They offered me a job as a mentor/counsellor for young girls who have been abused. I’m having trouble accepting that this could be the Lord’s will for me. Why? I would have to raise my own support in order to carry out this job but somehow my pride won’t let me do that. Lord please provide and please don’t put me to shame even though I probably need a bit of shaming to rid me of my pride.
29 June
I’m still praying about YfC. I’m in no rush to make a decision so I’m patiently waiting on the Lord and actively knocking on other doors. I had another good chat with my cousin about his relationship with the Lord. I’m sensing a breakthrough on the way! I listened to a teaching on lust by Jon Courson and it challenged me. “Lust always involves the death of something that would otherwise have lived and thrived.” He used the story of Amnon and Tamar to illustrate lust and it’s adverse effects. Rape is a horrible, horrible thing. Lord equip me to minister appropriately to these girls who have been through such a traumatic experience. The Lord gave me a greater passion to work to counter the evil of rape in this nation. Today I also started thinking about selling my car because it was in such disrepair and I need something reliable.
30 June
Happy Birthday Mom and Gogo! I always think it’s so wonderful how my mom was born on her mom’s birthday so they share a birthday! Quite a rarity and quite special. The gift of life is to be valued and not taken for granted. “Faith is living, daring confidence in God’s grace.” – Martin Luther. God put an unmistakeably extraordinary faith in my heart today. I want this daring confidence; I want to put myself in situations where I know God has to come through for me and allow Him to be glorified in me. Today a man at a local car dealership made me an offer on my car. I decided to put an ad in the paper and see the response.
So that’s the end of June. July, August and September coming soon...
